It was Thursday around 7pm when the bear sunk his sharp white teeth into me. I am finding that my body had been quite exhausted from the sudden increase in mileage, but I was still able to put in my 4 miles on Tuesday. My feet were burning, and I was terribly bored of the treadmill, but some positive messages from family and friends filled my mind and helped me to push through.
Thursday was different. It could have been the illnesses that are swarming through the office and the pool where I teach, or it could have been that my body finally said enough, but those 5 miles could have been 100. I barely made it through Mile 1 before I found myself making faces like a child who has just eaten their first brussel sprout. Coming up on Mile 2, my head started to spin, and I began side stepping on the treadmill, which is when I stopped, for fear of falling off, and went to splash some water on my face. It was at this point, that I genuinely felt like giving up. Kenny looked worried, and I just didn't know if I could make it. But something pushed me to get back on (I remembered the reason), and I finished with a pathetic combination of running, limping, panting, gagging and walking.
It was not glamorous by any stretch of the imagination, and it certainly didn't feel like any accomplishment, but I think it taught me a very important lesson about running, and another really important lesson about the person I want to be. It may not have been pretty, but I did it, and the more I train, the more I realize that that may be the reality of race day . . . and in the end, WHEN I cross the finish line, I will have raised money for a very important cause and I will have completed something I thought was impossible.
This weekend, we went to Mink Pond for an Ice Fishing Derby, so I missed another team run. It turned out that even though the team was scheduled to run 5, they ended up running 7! Coming off of my awful performance on Thursday, I was just hoping to get in the scheduled 5 without passing out. We headed to Cooper River, with bellies full of shamrock shakes and heavy legs from a weekend in the snow. Mile 1 was alright, Mile 2 a little better, and before I knew it, we had run 5 1/2 miles! My longest run to date. I felt really, really fantastic about it, and again, felt like I could have done more, but it was getting dark, and cold, and we hadn't yet unpacked from the weekend, so we headed home.
So, I guess I am learning that the road to success is not a straight line. There will be good days and bad days, and occasionally moments where I feel like I just want to quit, but I will remember the reason, and I will push through. For while the road may not be straight, it sure has made for an interesting journey so far.
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